In the News 
M
ikhail Gorbachev has evi-
dently concluded that only 
the threat of force can hold the 
Soviet Union together. With little 
warning last week, Soviet troops 
moved into Lithuania, the most 
restive of the country's indepen-
dent-minded republics. Tanks 
patrolled the streets; shots were 
fired. It looked like the beginning 
of a serious crackdown. 
<<Tdo rnind being described as 
X flaky, particularly by some-
body like Fred Barnes, who makes 
a living being flaky." - Nebraska 
Sen. Bob Kerrey, responding to 
the political commentator. 
{("^/ou men think the president 
X is all-powerful, but he is 
not, lie needs a lot of guidance 
from the Lord" - Barbara Bush, 
discussing her husbands' handling 
of the Persian Gulf crisis with 
schoolchildren. 
T
he capital consultants behind 
Washington's popular Hotline, 
a daily news digest for political 
junkies, will soon begin a comput-
erized Greenwire for the enviro-
conscious. Subscribers will get 
daily excerpts of science and pop-
ular magazines, newspapers and 
the publications of environmental 
groups such as Greenpeace and 
the Sierra Club. The service will 
cost about $3000 a year. 
Flipping Over 
Union 
page 6 
Elder Monk Helps Union Close 
the Door 
by Craig Carr 
E
lder J. Paul Monk, Central States 
Conference President, visited our 
campus last week to help us start our 
semester with spiritual emphasis. 
His Week of Prayer messages were 
about closing the door on secularism; 
closing the door on your past; closing 
the door on bigotry; how to be a 
Joseph when your father's name is 
Jacob; to name a few. He emphasized 
the concept of looking ahead to Jesus 
and putting aside things that hinder a 
true relationship with Him. 
I was especially impressed by his 
personal testimony given during the 
8:45 service on December 12. He 
spoke of his miraculous recovery from 
lung cancer. Doctors tried a new tech-
continued on page 3 
The Vine Predicts, 
page 8 
I Had a Dream... 
2 
Sports In the New Year 
3 
And So It Goes 
6 
Backward Glance 
7 
2 - The Clocktower 
I Had a Dream 
and "A Few 
Small Potatoes" 
Part 2 
by Junior Huffman 
It is still Thursday night and time to 
go to bed. That night I believe God 
gave me a dream and showed me 
where I could find that little "do-hick-
ie," I'd given up any hope of finding. 
In my dream 1 saw myself making 
some bread. Then the Lord showed 
THE CLOCKTOWER 
Editor 
Leland Krum 
Copy Editor 
Brenda Dickerson 
News Editor 
Amy Baugher 
Advertising Editor 
Arlin Blood 
Photo Editor 
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Greg Rumsey 
Printer 
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THE CLOCKTOWER is a 
bi-monthly 
publication of the ASB. It is a 
forum for a student-oriented news 
and opinion.. All letters, personals, 
stories, poems, king-size Snicker 
bars, dollar bills, and all loose 
change should be in our mailbox 
(in the College Bookstore) by 
Thursday at noon for inclusion the 
following week. All unsigned edi-
torials are the opinion of THE 
CLOCKTOWER and will be written by 
the editors. All other opinions 
expressed are those of the author 
and must bear his or her name. 
THE CLOCKTOWER reserves the 
right 
to edit and/or paraphrase letters 
for reasons of clarity and space. 
Address: 3800 South 48th Street 
Lincoln, NE 68506 
Phone: (402) 488-2331 
me part of a loaf of bread that I'd had 
for a while and had thrown it in Jhe 
trash after it started to mold. The little 
lever was still inside the bottom of the 
loaf where I had forgotten to remove it 
after baking. I immediately woke up. 
It was 3:45 AM. I tried to go back to 
sleep, thinking that I'd look for it in 
the morning: but the Lord would not 
let me rest. 
I felt a sudden surge of 
energy, so I found it impossible to lie 
still. 
I got up and began searching 
through the trash in my room which 
had been piling up for a couple 
weeks, but had neglected to take out. 
Eureka! There it was in the very loaf I 
had seen in my dream. 
By the way, 
this is not an indication you should let 
trash pile up in your room. The Lord 
just happened to use my laziness for 
good in spite of myself. 
Praise the Lord! What an encour-
agement this was to me. 
This came 
just at a time when I was having all 
kinds of problems and financial diffi-
culties, which I still have but at least I 
know God still is working in my life. 
It reminded me of the experience of 
Jacob, feeling alone and forsaken by 
the Lord when He was encouraged by 
. 
a dream also. If you are feeling any of 
these things, know that if God is work-
ing in my life then He also is working 
in yours, behind the scenes and out of 
sight mostly, but never far away. And 
4 
He is not just a spectator of your life, 
but real and alive, upclose and very, 
very active. 
Aside from the obvious lessons we 
usually derive from stories we hear 
like this, I believe there is an even 
more important spiritual lesson and 
truth from this precious experience. I 
feel convicted to share it with you. I 
asked God, "Why wait nearly 2 weeks 
to show me?" To give up on myself 
you say; for me to reach the end of my 
rope and hope you say? And I would 
agree, yet something further I am con-
vinced is very, very important. 
I believe it was the contact with 
God's Word prior to this dream which 
continued on page 4 
Whv 
not work at Glacier View 
Ranch in beautiful Colorado? 
Get an application from Rich Carl-
son's office. 
have skills in: 
January 
18, 
1991 
White Water Rafting 
Rock Climbing 
Rappelling 
Kayaking 
Mountain Bikes 
Swimming Instruction 
Backpacking 
Canoeing 
Sailing 
Archery 
Horsemanship 
Call or write; 
Rocky Mountain Conference 
Vouth Department 
2520 South Downing 
Denver, Colorado 
80210 
(303)733-3771 
You 
need 
to 
apply! 
UC News 
The Clocktower - 3 
Sports in the 
New Year 
by Mark Pfeiffer 
T
he New Year brings with it 
a lot of things. 
From cold 
and snow to work and studies, 
but it also brings a change in the 
sports world. 
The NFL moves to the 
playoffs and the college teams are 
done with their season. 
So the focus 
starts to change. 
Basketball is the new focus for the 
next few months. College hoops really 
start to kick in to high gear. 
Teams 
such as UNLV, Arkansas, Arizona, 
Ohio St. and many others began to 
show up on TV to give us something 
to watch on cold weekends. I person-
ally predict UNLV, Arkansas, Arizona, 
and North Carolina will make up the 
Final Four in march. UNLV will be the 
National Champs over Arkansas and 
stick another thom in the side of the 
NCAA for Jerry Tarkanian. 
Closer to home basketball is also 
the talk. The Schick SuperHoops tour-
nament was played the first couple of 
days after Christmas vacation. This 3-
on-3 tournament is exciting 
and offers a tremendous 
variety of thrills. 
The 
Championship game was 
between two teams led 
by brothers. The Dondi 
and Meechi Smith team 
versus the Craig and 
Mark Perlburg team. 
The Smith came out on 
top. I hope all the partic-
ipants enjoyed their gifts from Schick. 
The U.C. team is back after vacation 
with some changes. The interim head 
coach, Ron Dodds, was given a con-
tract as the full-time coach. 
Another 
change will be the absence of Allen 
"Six-Pack" Hevener. 
He was a great 
scorer and shot blocker, but was lost 
to recruiting violations. 
Okay so he 
transferred, but a scandal sounded 
cool for a very brief moment. The 
team will bring a new fast-breaking, 
three-point bombing, running and 
gunning, opponent dazzling offense 
that is sure to rock the "Thunder-
dome". It will also give Coach Dodds 
the chance to pace the sidelines 
encouraging the players to kick it up 
another notch. Be sure to show up at 
the home games in the next three 
weeks and we thank you 
for your support. 
I would like to leave 
you with some 
final 
thoughts. First of all Mike 
Francesa is a windbag-
"Notre Dame by two 
touchdowns?" 
Right, 
Mike. Maybe Bill Walsh 
is actually pleasant to lis-
ten too. 
To all the Big 
Red fans...well look on 
the bright side, Brent 
Musburger made you 
sound good. 
To the 
Rocket Ismail, go pro I'm 
tired of hearing about 
you. 
And finally to the 
Colorado Buffaloes the 
National Champs-make 
sure you thank Charles 
Thompson and the Refs 
and of course Public 
Bienemy #1. So long 
from the sports desk. 
• 
Elder Monk 
continued from page 1 
nique in treatment, causing him to 
experience trauma as his body's own 
immune system attempted to conquer 
the deadly disease. After weeks of 
treatment and anticipation of an 
unknown outcome, the doctors told 
him, to their own surprise, that the 
cancer was gone! 
This brought out a unique point 
about God's healing from sin. Yes, 
God comforts and soothes us from the 
pain of this world, but we are still only 
in a remission. We won't be complete-
ly free from the pains of sin until He 
comes to take us 
away from this 
world of war and sin. 
As we consider those risking their 
lives for world peace in the Persian 
Gulf, let's join together in a heartfelt 
prayer that Christ's return will be soon: 
to relieve us at last from bloodshed of 
war, and that the battle between good 
and evil will finally be over. 
• 
LSAT 
GMAT 
MCATl 
GRE 
STANLEY H. KAPLAN 
Take Kaplan Or Take Your Oiances 
216 N. 11th, Suite 102 
Lincoln, NE (402)475-7010 
NEXT CLASS 
GMAT: Jan. 15 
GRE: Jan. 17 
LSAT: March 3 
MCAT Feb. 3 
January 
18, 
1991 
Union's 100th 
Birthday Party! 
4 - The Clocktower 
Opinion 
The Effects of a 
Recession 
by Julie Allardyee 
R
ecession, defined by many as six 
months of declining Gross Nation-
al Product, is sending our country's 
economy into a slump. 
One of the biggest factors causing 
the recession is the rise in the price of 
oil. If there is a prolonged war in the 
gulf, the price of oil could be pushed 
well above the October peak in dollars 
per barrel. 
This could inconvience 
students to stay at school more often. 
I Had a Dream 
continued from page 2 
* 
made it possible for the Lord to so dra-
matically make clear to me the answer. 
The lesson came again to me, with a 
new force, that God's Word is really 
alive and powerful and life-giving. 
God probably was trying to tell me 
sooner, but my soul was not in tune to 
receive the answer. 
In these last days of earth's history 
when wickedness abounds. When we 
fail to discern God's hand in our lives 
and in our hearts; I pray we all may 
discover anew, the preciousness of 
God's word. Contemplate these texts; 
John 6:53, "Most assuredly, I say to 
you, unless you eat the flesh of the 
Son of Man and drink His blood, you 
have no life in you." And vs. 63, "It is 
the Spirit who gives life; the flesh prof-
its nothing. The words that I speak to 
you are spirit, and they are life. 
The Lords servant has told us that 
the words of God in the Bible contain 
the very life of God Himself wants to 
impart to us, if we are willing to 
receive it. Are you willing? May God 
bless you, and a special thank you to 
Elder Roeske because those "few small 
potatoes", still work. 
• 
"With the higher prices of gas, they 
might find themselves not driving 
home to Colorado on the weekend," 
commented Craig Carr. 
Another factor making the recession 
more severe is that the excessive 
spending of the eighties has finally 
caught up with consumers. 
This is 
resulting in less consumer spending, 
putting the rest of the economy in 
danger. 
For college students this will 
mean,"rethinking lifestyles," and cause 
us to, "reaccess into things that are 
really important," according to Joy 
Barker, assistant professor of Account-
ing. 
An additional factor is the wave of 
nervousness the recession has sent 
through the banking system. Many of 
the biggest banks in the country are 
debt ridden and are merging with 
competitors to stay alive. This crisis is 
causing the banks to be reluctant to 
lend money, and will mean, "more 
competition for grants and loans," 
Barry Forbes said. 
An extended war in the gulf could 
cause banks to plunge further into 
debt, and could result in widespread 
bank collapse. In order to stabilize the 
health of the banking system and the 
consumer market, this generation will 
"have to pay for spending in the past, 
not just the debt they get to enjoy," 
said Dr. George Gibson. 
For seniors, they will be looking for 
work and may have a hard time find-
ing it. "Large corporations are cutting 
back the number of people they hire," 
said Forbes. Since it will be harder for 
graduates to find work it might, 
"encourage them to come back to 
school because of lack of availability," 
according to Dr. Gibson. 
Companies have been attacking 
payrolls, to keep profit, causing unem-
ployment to swell in the last few 
months of 1990. 
To prevent profits 
from falling further, industries could 
keep dismissing workers. 
These 
industries will be injuring white and 
blue collar workers alike, instead of 
the usual blue collar worker recession 
January 
18, 
1991 
Rocky Mountain Conference 
AdvENfisT WINTER FESTIVAL 
February 28 - March 4, 1991 
• 
Over 600 people expected! 
Who's invited? Everyone! Young, Old, Families, Singles, Church Youth 
• 
Groups, Acadamiea, Colleges, Ski Clubs, and Youl 
Costs: 
Lift Tickets - $21/day 
Ski Rental - $6.50/day 
Condos - $18-150/person/night 
Colorado offers some of the best snow skiing 
in the world! 
Sabbath programming: Friday night drama presentation 
"hoi" Sabbath morning worship service, Sabbath 
aftemooon Biblical snow carving contest, concert, 
and more! 
Sunday features a NASTAR race with an awards party 
For Information Packct contact Rocky Mountain Youth 
Department. 2520 So. Downing, Denver. CO 80210. 
Phone (303) 733-3771, Fax (303) 733-1843. 
BuEckENRidqc, ColonAdo 
Campus Ministries 
The Clocktower - 5 
Recession 
continued from page 4 
in the manufacturing business. 
This recession began in the service 
area, causing companies to endanger 
white collar workers, by cutting posi-
tions by the hundreds of thousands. 
These cuts are at the center of most of 
our parents jobs. One student, Shawn 
Nolan, is hopeful, "I hope it doesn't 
affect me, my parents jobs are secure," 
he said. 
Although amidst an "economic crisis, 
some remain optimistic. 
'Recessions 
tend not to hit Mid-America as hard," 
Mrs. Barker noted. Michael Shafer and 
Lisa Gerrans also remain on the posi-
tive side. 
"I'm very optimistic, our 
economy is strong and will ride it out," 
Michael said. "It affected me positive-
ly, the stores had over half price sales 
after Christmas," added Lisa. 
The recession is potentially danger-
ous to us all, "I believe the recession 
will eventually hit all of us in some 
way or another, if it continues on its' 
present course," David Tan said. 
By 
taking the proper precautions, we can 
be sure to restore our economy's 
health and prevent the development of 
a severe recession or a depression. 
• 
From Amalick to Ad-lib Sabbath 
Calendar 
January 18: Vespers - Steve and 
Annie Chapman 
VI Alternative - SM Video by 
Randy and Stephanie Stickney 
19: CVC - Bob Bretsch 
SOS - "Beyond the Barriers" *2 
ASB - Film: "Driving Miss Daisy" 
21; 
Martin Luther King, Jr.'s 
Birthday 
ASB Senate 
CABL "LEGS" Week 
22: BTM/W-UC 
24: 
BTW-UC 
25: Soup Suppers 
26: CVC - Rich Carlson 
SOS - "Beyond the Barriers" #3 
27: Super Bowl 
28: UC's lOOthe Birthday Party 
29: ASB Convocation 
30: Academy Band Festival 
Next CLOCKTOWER 
Jenny McCollum 
T^ear friends, 
Hi! 
I can't believe it's October 
already! The time is going by so fast! 
Well, actually each individual day goes 
by slowly (especially if my students act 
the way they did today!), but the 
weeks go by extremely fast! 
So much has happened since the 
last time I wrote that I don't even 
know where to start! Even though my 
kids are (like I mentioned earlier) on 
occasion holy terrors, I love them 
more and more every day! Those of 
you who know me and know what a 
sentimental fool I am will not be sur-
prised when you hear that I already 
started crying thinking about leaving 
them next spring! We were out at 
recess one day, and one little girl sat 
on the ground and then another kid 
came and sat on her lap, and another, 
and another until there was a huge 
pile of kids and they were laughing 
and saying "Teacher, look!" and they 
were so cute and... (Well, like I said, 
some of you know how easily I cry!). 
A couple of weeks ago, three other 
girls and I went to a little church in a 
village called Amalick (pronounced I-
mah-leek). 
It was so cute! 
It was 
made out of tin, but it was very clean 
and had a steeple and everything! We 
had to take our shoes off before we 
went inside (that's one of the customs 
here). 
We sang a couple of special 
numbers a capella without practicing, 
and then we put on a very ad lib Sab-
bath School for the children! We're 
really learning to be good at ad lib-
bing. The Palauans are very laid back, 
and I often get told five minutes 
before vespers that I am to play the 
piano for song service. 
continued in next issue, January 30 
January 
18, 
1991 
Rocky Mountain Conference; 
ifouth Department 
2520 South Downing 
Denver, Colorado '80210 
d 
;303) 733-3771 
6 - The Clocktower 
And So It Goes / Feature 
Observations 
by Kelly V. Schmitt 
M
y usual anticipation at the start of 
a new year evaporated several 
shopping days after Christmas. 
New 
Year's Eve was fast approaching, and 
my New Year's resolution list remained 
empty. The list is empty still. I finally 
comprehended that resolutions as we 
know them do not belong to the new 
year. 
Those intentions of losing 
weight, starting an exercise program, 
beginning a strong daily devotional 
life, and leaving procrastination behind 
are decisions that must be made every 
day. I am more acquainted with today 
than the year to come, and today is a 
better place to begin than the new 
year. It is past, and any resolutions I 
might have made would be broken by 
now. 
There is always today, and 
always another day to do what we 
could not do today. « 
Keeping up with the news is an 
integral part of my daily life, but in the 
last few days I have been following 
newscasts to the exclusion of other 
important matters. 
My macabre fasci-
nation with the events transpiring in 
the Middle East is in direct contradic-
tion to many emotions I am experienc-
ing. On the one hand, I tum on the 
television as soon as I walk into my 
room, but generally halfway through a 
program I tum it off because I can no 
longer watch the faces of the young 
men receiving last minute instructions 
from their commanding officers. I can 
no longer listen to retired military offi-
cers-turned-military analysts describe 
how we are going to decimate the 
Iraqi military with our superior air 
power and more numerous forces. 
I 
can no longer listen to a soldier say, 
with an overrated sense of his mas-
culinity, that going into combat is part 
of being a man. I can no longer watch 
friends and family of servicepeople 
weep in their support groups. 
War 
has not yet come but the realities have 
set in. 
Simply flipping channels during a 
commercial during a special news 
report on CBS the night of the four-
teenth reminded me that in spite of the 
Mideast crisis, life goes on. 
Arsenio 
Hall and Johnny Carson stand bravely 
at their posts to keep that in the fore-
front. 
Occasionally even Arsenio 
soberly comments on the threat we 
face. On Monday night's program he 
expressed the hope that the only war 
we'll see this week is the NFL playoffs. 
The audience applauded. 
If there is 
war, we'll need the laughs more than 
ever. 
1? 
Sometimes I like to imagine Barbara 
and George lying awake at night 
somewhere in the family quarters of 
the White House. They are grandpar-
ents, and they have no certainty that 
the world will be a peaceful place for 
those children. 
Deep in his heart 
George must want to believe that he is 
doing the right thing for them. 
He 
must believe in something larger than 
our unnecessary dependence on for-
eign oil. In the light of his grandchil-
dren, naked aggression is the genuine 
issue. Unfortunately, he is the leader of 
250 million people, and the grandchil-
dren fall into insignificance behind 
their shadow. He is not Jimmy Carter, 
for whom the grandchildren would be 
infinitely more important. 
In that old 
game of staring down, he is not the 
type of man who will blink (and may I 
be cursed if I am wrong). 
* 
We have little to be opti-
mistic about in 1991, but a 
great deal for which to be 
thankful. 
Life we have, but 
that is pessimistically tenu-
i ous. Liberty is ours still. The 
pursuit of happiness is an 
intensely personal issue, and 
not 
dependent 
on 
the 
vagaries of international poli-
tics. 
• 
Flipping Over 
Union College 
by Kelly Strom 
B
eing a wife, a mother, a coach, 
and a gymnast is a tough act to 
follow. Nonetheless, Cindy Spaulding 
does all of these things, and does them 
well. 
"I'm 28 years old," Cindy volunteers, 
"and I would have killed to be in this 
kind of shape when I was in college." 
Cindy feels that being a gymnast and a 
coach has really added an extra 
dimension to her life. "Learning is so 
exciting," Cindy says. "When my two 
year old starts to cry for the fifth time 
in one morning, I know I have gym-
nastics 
to 
look 
forward 
to 
at 
hinchtime." 
Spaulding has competed on the 
national level as a part of a women's 
pair routine. She is also the assistant 
coach for the Union College Gymnas-
tics Team. To keep up with her strenu-
ous schedule, Cindy lifts weights and 
swims three times a week. She feels 
that her strength has increased consid-
erably in the last year. 
The Union College Gymnastics 
Team has enhanced the lives of many 
other students as well. Adding gym-
nastics to their schedule has 
given 
incoming students a feeling of unity 
and helped to develop responsibility. 
Coach Frank Martinez, along with 
Spaulding, hopes to nurture his 32 
team members into a more physically 
fit lifestyle, and a closer walk with 
God. "The close friendships and spiri-
tual growth the team makes is some-
thing that can be held onto for a life-
time," Martinez states. "I hope my 
gymnastics program can add some-
thing extra to their lives." 
Changing practices from evening to 
lunch time seems to have drawn even 
more students into the sport. "I just 
couldn't seem to juggle gymnastics and 
homework last year," veteran gymnast 
Darin Loewen 
concedes, "but the 
change to lunchtime really made 
things a lot easier for me." 
New talent has come in this year in 
large numbers. Many team members 
continued on page 7 
OtL*ti 
l 
HP.1 
Specialized sla'n care hi 
lent, 
moles, wartt, rashes, 
allergies, psoriasis, scalp, hiir, Mil, and foot problems. 
COLLEGE STUDENTS RECIEVE MEDICATION FOR ACNE 
Cenyenient office hours on Saturday, Teusday evening, 
and wo rial] hours fir working people, students, and children. 
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yy 
Backward Glance 
The Clocktower - 7 
Recreation at UC, Part One. 
by Garry Treft 
H 
ere is a look at winter 
activities at Union Col-
lege. This will continue for 
the next several issues. 
In the winter of 1938-38 
Einar, Orason Lee Brinker, and a few others skied about a mile and a half east of the college off the 
hill which today forms the south shore of the North thumb of Holmes Lake. It is east of the big flood control 
dam and was reached by walking out Calvert Street to the hill. 
"The boys thought it too far to trudge all the way out into the country and inveigled the administration into allowing 
them to build a slide similar to the portable one Knar's father used. Accordingly they constructed one with the west end 
on the laundry above the powerhouse with the slide sloping toward the east. There was a little decline some forty feet 
east of the takeoff." 
Flipped 
continued from page 6 
commented on the large size of the 
team. However, most feel that the year 
promises to be one of the best that 
Union College Gymnastics has seen 
yet 
As a whole, the Team seems to be 
tremendously satisfied with the gym-
nastics program, senior, Dan Klein 
feels that gymnastics has made his col-
lege experience more rewarding. "The 
hard work and commitment needed 
for gymnastics has really disciplined 
me," Dan said. 
Along with the hard work will also 
come a lot of enjoyment. Martinez has 
lined up five weekend tours as well as 
various one night shows. 
"First 
semester is a time when the team must 
really work together." Frank says, "The 
unity we build is what will make our 
team a success." 
Going on tour usually means a 
weekend spent at a particular academy 
or junior academy. The team shares it's 
commitment to Christ by presenting a 
Vespers and Sabbath School program 
to the students. Saturday night is the 
gymnastics performance, and good-
byes are said on Sunday. Among other 
things, Union gymnasts will tour Cam-
pion Academy and Boulder Junior 
Academy. Skiing down the slopes at 
Winter Park, Colorado will 
conclude 
this four day 
tour. 
"I can't pass that up," Cindy con-
cedes. "I need a break just like every-
one else." 
It seems, however, that Cindy's cur-
rent break is over. She is already half 
way across the gym and headed for a 
row of mats. Her two children are tod-
dling after her. Surprisingly, they sit 
quietly on the fringes of the blue Nis-
san mat that Cindy is practicing on. 
Today she is working on her back flip. 
It may take Cindy one more time or 
25, because gymnastics is unpre-
dictable. One thing is certain—Cindy, 
along with many other team members, 
will work until they achieve their 
goals. 
• 
EVANGELISM 101 
Real Evangelism: Whai b II? 
Needed: Male or 
Female willing to 
work long hours 
for little pay here 
in beautiful Den-
ver, 
Colorado. 
Position involved 
assisting 
the 
Rocky 
Mountain 
Conference Youth Department in Youth, Young Adult 
Programming for one semester. 
- Person needed by January 1, 1991 
- Need your own transportation ideally 
- Must be organized, sharp appearance, but most of 
all a committed Christian that wants to share Christ 
with others 
For more information contact Rich Carlson's office or 
call or write: 
(See other R.M.C. advertisement for address.) 
January 
1 
19 9 1 
8 - The Clocktower 
The Vine 
The Vine 
Predicts . . . 
by Jeanie Nixon 
I
see a future for Union 
College and the people 
here. No, not everything is 
pretty, but when is reality 
ever really "pretty?" So, here 
it is, the Union College of 
the future year. 
I predict that Dr. Ward Hill 
(after retirement from Union) will 
sign a contract with MGM as direc-
tor of their Golden Oldies Video 
Archives. 
His motto will be, then as 
now, "When no one else can get it to 
work, just see 'Captain 
Video.'" 
Within the coming 
year, all floor 
hockey enthusi-
asts at Union will 
declare the Union 
College gymnasi-
um 
"National 
Floor 
Hockey 
Headquarters of 
America." 
Be on 
the lookout for a 
large sign which could 
be in the making even 
now. I predict it will 
say, "Run quickly and 
carry a big stick!" 
Elvis Presley, lured 
out of hiding by the 
SPEND A YEAR IN 
CHINA 
TEACHING ENGLISH 
This will be one of the most 
rewarding years of your life. 
Opportunities are now open for 
qualified college graduates to 
teach in government schools 
in 
MAINLAND CHINA 
For more information contact: 
Dr. M. T. Bascom or Treva Burgees 
General Conference of SDA 
12501 Old Columbia Pike 
Silver Spring, MD 20904 
Phone: (301)680-6000 
Fax: (301)680-6090 
deli's famous "Macho Nachos," will be 
interviewed by a student 
news 
reporter. Not only will the student be 
commended for excellence in journal-
ism, he or she will also capture world-
wide attention and focus it on the 
"Elvis Ate Here Deli," causing lunch 
and supper lines to be three times as 
long. 
Stacie Greer will decide that she 
likes "hats." I predict that she may 
decide to keep her favorite one forev-
er. 
In addition to other faculty leaving 
Union, Dr. Show will also decide to 
leave, devoting the rest of his life to 
golf. 
Look for him next time you watch 
the P.G.A. tour. 
Doug "Fresh" Hardt will forego his 
three remaining seasons as point guard 
for the U.C. Witnessing Warriors (unof-
ficial name) to enter the 1991 N.B.A 
draft. I predict that the Minnesota 
Timberwolves will try to enhance their 
back court by selecting him in the first 
round. 
I predict that a new student named 
Bart Simpson will enroll for fall class-
es. 
After a student demonstration 
staged challenging worship credit 
requirements and dormitory policies, 
he may be sent back to T.V. Land, 
U.SA. 
Barry Forbes will be called from his 
current work in the Union College 
Bookstore to solve the F.D.I.C. crisis. 
Wish him luck. 
I predict that Greg Carter will get up 
his nerve! 
Be advised. 
Union will be swept 
with a new dating trend. 
Reverse 
weekend will be the weekend for guys 
to ask girls out. 
Bob Hope will call the Sweet Feat 
Jugglers to tour with him during his 
Desert Shield Tour. 
They will enter-
tain many of our troops, including 
Captain Byard Parks, on permanent 
dishwashing assignment somewhere in 
the sands of the gulf. 
Finally, in closing, please remember 
Coach Dodds' famous last words, 
"Kick it up a notch," and simply enjoy 
this coming year. 
• 
January 
18, 
1991