V CLOCK Jlwoi Vol. XLI UNION COLLEGE, LINCOLN, NEBRASKA, MAY 4, 1967 No. 25 Bieber Is New LLU Pres. LOMA LINDA, Calif.-La Sierra College President David J. Bieber will become president of Loma Linda University when the college and the university are merged on July 1. A teacher and school administra- tor for all of his adult life, Bieber was president of Union College for seven years before accepting the La Sierra College presidency in 1965. In assuming the Loma Linda University presidency, Bieber will succeed Dr. Godfrey T. Anderson, the university's chief executive for over 13 years. Anderson announc- ed on Feb. 6 that he will step down as president at die end of June. President-elect Bieber is a native of Tolstoy, S. Dak., who earned a Bachelor of Arts degree at Union College in 1936 and a Master of Arts degree at die University of Minnesota in 1945. He has since taken additional graduate studies at Stanford University and at the University of California at Berke- ley. The university of which he be- comes president July 1 will include under die single administration teaching programs now carried on by the separate academic institu- tions at Riverside and Loma Linda. The existing La Sierra College, with about 1700 students, is a co- educational liberal arts college of- fering programs leading to bach- elor's and master's degrees. On the Loma Linda University campus are centered bachelor's, master's and doctoral programs in die basic sciences, health professions and limited liberal arts fields. The merger plan, approved by Loma Linda University and by La Sierra College audiorities calls for unification under one name, Loma Linda University, effective July 1. Integration of teaching and admin- istrative programs will be accom- plished in stages during the ensu- ing 12 months. Many details of the merger pro- cess remain to be worked out, but it appears clear that instruction will continue on bodi die Loma Linda and Riverside campuses. "A Song Will Rise," set in the Civil War Soudi, was the dieme of the Junior-Senior banquet held in the Omaha Room of the Nebraska Center for Continuing Education, Apr. 30. A group known as the Discords, consisting of Herman Harp, a jun- ior theology major, and Marvin Ponder, a Union College graduate now at Andrews University, were the featured entertainment. The music was all folk music; much of it about Civil War days. Other folk singers were a girls' trio, Cindy. Sandy and Ruth from the University of Nebraska; die Noblemen, a group of 11 from Southeast High School; and die Bards; a group of three boys and a girl from Southeast High School. D. J. Fike, instructor in English, was the emcee who introduced the performers and told of his "South- ern heritage." Jan Schultz, president of the jun- ior class, was assisted in planning the program by Marybeth Watkins, Sandy Thayer, Clyde Cooper, Lar- ry Vandeman, Bob Holbrook, Glen Gessele, Dr. Rene Evard and El- don Christie, sponsors. SMC Hosts EIW; ASB Officers Attend The newly-elected ASB executive officers are attending the Eastern Intercollegiate Workshop at South- ern Missionary College, May 3-5. The workshop is held each spring so that the incoming officers can exchange ideas and work on solu- tions to campus problems. Don Bush, ASB president-elect, heads the list of Union College's Coming, CventA David J. Bieber, former pres- ident of Union College, is the new president of LLU-LSC merger. Friday, May 5 7:20 a.m. Convocation—gym Music Week 5:15-6:30 p.m. Cafeteria Supper 7:15 p.m. Dormitory Worship 8:27 p.m. Sunset Saturday, May 6 Sabbath Services College View—49th & Prescott 8:25 & 11:00 a.m. M. D. Hannah 9:40 a.m. Sabbath school Piedmont Park—48th & A 11:00 a.m. Roger McQuistan 9:30 a.m. Sabbath school Northside—73rd & Lexington 11:00 a.m. Myron Voegele 9:30 a.m. Sabbath school Capitol View—15th & D 11:00 a.m. Peter Luna 9:30 a.m. Sabbath school Alton Chapel—22nd & Q 11:00 a.m. 9:30 a.m. Sabbath school 5:30-6:30 p.m. Cafeteria Supper 8:10 p.m. College View vespers 8:27 p.m. Sunset 9:00 p.m. Mooreheads Magic Show Monday, May 8 7:20 a.m. Chapel—church Mr. Rankin Board Approves Staff And Tuition Increase (Photo by Bud Gooch) Marvin Ponder and Herman Harp sing for juniors and sen- iors and their dates at last Sunday night's banquet. Discords, Civil War Theme For Junior-Senior Banquet A change in the faculty wage scale, increase in tuition rates and die building of a new industrial complex were approved by the Union College board on Apr. 27. According to G. T. Gott, business manager, faculty salaries will be in- creased and the basic salary differ- ence between the head of the fam- ily and a single person will not exist. However, the head of the family will receive more benefits. An increase in the tuition rate raises the cost for two semesters of full work to $1000, besides a $40 ASB and Blue Cross-Blue Shield fee. This figure represents a $160 increase in tuition for full work. Compared to the $26 per semester hour for 1966 summer school, 1967 summer school classes will cost $32 per semester hour. To be constructed on the present football field late this summer, a new industrial complex will house the print shop, bookbindery, laun- dry, power plant and the mainte- nance, grounds and custodial de- partments. Additional space will also be provided for die expanding furniture factory. Plans were approved for a new athletic field to be located east of College View Academy, 52nd and Calvert. Within the 600 foot square field will be baseball fields, a foot- ball field and a track. The board also voted to invite Elder A. J. Hirsch, who is current- ly at Madison. College, a state col- lege in Harrisburg, Va., to join the UC faculty as assistant professor of sociology. At a previous board meeting, two other faculty appoint- ments were approved. Gilbert Mc- Millen from Maplewood Academy will be joining the faculty as an instructor in biology and Melvin Baker will be instructing in the math department. Master Magicians Present Tricks Saturday Night Bob and Judy Moorehead, die "Master Magicians," will present their evening of magic Saturday night, May 6. The magical performance, styled with a touch of comedy, is a pre- sentation of "many original mys- teries combined with some of the oldest classics." Their program in- cludes the production of white java doves, tricks with a handkerchief borrowed from the audience and the Hindu trunk trick. Aside from Moorehead's tour schedule in which he has appeared in 17 s t at e s in the past eight months, he has had his own tel- evision program. Due to the recent change of daylight saving time in the Lin- coln area, the "Master Magicians" program will not be presented until 9:00 in the Union College audito- representatives going to the con- vention in Collegedale, Tenn. Other UC students making the trip are: Linda Sterling, '68 vice-pres.; Glenn Sackett, '68 Golden Cords editor; Philip Brailsford, '68 CLOCK TOWER editor; and Harvey Kilsby, treasurer. Dr. Rene Evard, ASB sponsor, and Robert Britain are sponsoring the trip. VP rntm, wmimi lif®fst liistii mm I iSp: 1MB liii The Mooreheads will present magic tricks this Saturday night. 2 CLOCK TOWER May 4, 1967 THE BOOKSHELF W CLOCK JWCn "Each Man Is An Island 11 • • • OpiniaM expressed In the editorial column are those of the editors. Viewpoints •anted in the signed articles on this page are those of the individual writer. BEVERLY BEEM EMTOB TWYLA SCHLOTTHAUER MANAGING EDITOB KARLA KRAMPERT ASSOCIATE EDITOR RON HASSEN LINDA BRENNAN NEWS EDITORS Published weekly during the school year by the Associated Student Body of Union College, 3800 So. 48th St, Lincoln Nebr. 68506, except holidays, registration periods and examination weeks. Subscription rates $2.50 per year. Business Manager Walt Sparks Advertising Manager Ric Green Treasurer Ann Randall Circulation Manager Secretary Photographer . Denver Campus Editor Music Editor Religion Editor Sports Editor Cartoonist _ Harvey Kilsby Sue Prosser Bud Gooch Judy Nelson Gloria Durichek _ Norman Jarnes Bob Blehm — W. L Rankin STAFF WRITERS Karen Astner. Gisela Behrendt, Joyce Bennett, Lynnet DeRemer, Rosalyn Humphrey, Sherry Liggett, Meredith Matthews, Rick Marasco, Jim Rosenthal, Evelyn Rutan, Linda Sterling, Reporters The Newswriting Class Editorial Advisors Financial Advisor . Dr. Veme Wehtje, D. J. Fike Dr. Paul W. Joioe %Vkat Clection (Board? Last week the CLOCK TOWER editorial discussed one of the two main aspects of the prosposed revised constitution—the student council. This week we will take up the other issue—the second vice-president. The duties of the second vice-president are what his name implies—assisting the officers—especially in coordinating com- mittees, but he is more than this. The revised constitution in- cludes a revised Nominations and Elections Committee which is not a committee nor does it deal with nominations. It is an election board—headed by the second vice-president. What is the difference between a nominations and elec- tions committee and an election board? The main difference is in the fact that an election board will be under the auspices of the ASB while the committee is independent. Sometime ago in Union's history, the Nominations and Elections Committee was sponsored by the ASB, but at that time the committee was in charge of all elections, including SS and MV, not just ASB. The system was too cumbersome to be practical—so the pendulum swung to the other extreme—no elections were sponsored by the ASB. All was done by a serv- ice committee. This means that the committee exists for the use of other organizations, but is not a part of them. And no one has to use it. Now the ASB feels the need of an election board of its own to handle ASB elections only. What for? What would be the difference? The main difference is that as a part of the ASB the elec- tions will he run by students elected to represent the student body—not a select committee. In other words a student com- mittee ivill not decide who of their fellow students can and cannot run. The function of the board will be to publicize the election, provide petitions and organize the machinery of the elections— not choose the candidates. The only screening a candidate will have to go through will be the Student Affairs Committee, a petition of 25 signa- tures and possibly a minimum grade point average. The present system of rejecting a candidate and then al- lowing him to run if he can gain an appropriate number of pe- titions seems to be an unnecessary procedure. It is like saying, "We don't think you are a good candidate, but if you can get a petition you can run anyway." An initial petition is not to over- ride a committee, but a gesture of initiative demonstrating enough desire to talk to at least 25 people. Of course, the Student Affairs Committee must be able to screen the candidates. We see no reason why this should be changed. But there is a way to make even this more fair to the potential candidate. We suggest that the Student Affairs Com- mittee call in the student if there is a question concerning his name. This would give the student a chance to explain his po- sition or clear up a misunderstanding that may exist. The whole object of this change from a Committee to an ASB Board is to allow more people to be able to run and put the election itself in the hands of student representatives. The object of all of these revisions is to provide a more workable guideline by making the constitution liberal enough to be accommodating yet tight enough to give system which can be carried over from year to year. B.B. BY ARTHUR HAUCK Ayn Rand, The Virtue of Selfish- ness New York: The New Amer- ican Library of World Literature, 1964. 144 pp. Signet P2602. 60<». For those who still pause long enough to ponder the right or wrong of an incipient attitude or an anticipated act the pivotal ques- tions seem to be by what law, by which principle, by whose standard should judgments and decisions be made? Whenever these questions enter the public forum the pendu- lum swings erratically along a con- tinum with society's mores on the one extreme and heaven's "abso- lutes" on the odier. In her presen- tation of the moral principles of objectivism, Rand brings the pen- dulum to rest somewhere in the center at a point marked "self" with the assertion that "the Objectivist ethics holds man's life as the stand- ard of value—and his own life as the ethical purpose of every indi- vidual man." According to Rand "the three cardinal values of the Objectivist ethics—the three values which, to- gether, are the means to the real- ization of one's ultimate value, one's own life—are: Reason, Pur- pose, and Self-Esteem, with their corresponding virtues: Rationality, Productiveness and Pride." In this final motley triumvirate, rationality is accorded the highest place as man's basic virtue and the source of al] other virtues. She describes pride as "moral ambitiousness" and strongly rejects "any doctrine that preaches self immolation as a moral virtue or duty." With man's mind firmly fastened to his own boot- straps pride provides the propul- sion for plucking himself out of the muck of altruism and holding him suspended in self-space with a grim grin on his somber face as to him- self he loudly lauds the virtue of selfishness. Rand affirmed that "die basic social principle of Objectivist ethics is that just as life is an end in itself, so every living human be- ing is an end in himself, not the means to the ends or the welfare of others—and, therefore, that man must live for his own sake, neither sacrificing himself to others nor sacrificing others to himself. To live for his own sake means that the achievement of his own happiness is man's highest moral purpose." This subborn egoistic stance seems to frighten the wilUy-nilly Christian and threaten to unmask the pious hypocrisy of those who must use or abuse others, often in the name of their god, in order to STo>D£NT ONIOM SHAcKs "I'm registered for sixteen hours of television, NON- CREDIT!" reach the place they feel they de- serve in the sun. The gpod that many sporadically do for odiers is prompted only by an omnivorous appetite for a subsequent pie in the sky. According to Rand, "the prin- ciple of trade is die only rational ethical principle for all human re- lationships, personal and social, pri- vate and public, spiritual and ma- terial. It is the principle of justice." She defines "a trader as a man who earns what he gets and does does not treat men as masters or slaves but as independent equals. He deals with men by means of a free, voluntary, unforced, unco- erced exchange—an exchange which benefits both parties by their own independent judgment. A trader does not expect to be paid for his defaults, only for his achievements. He does not switch to others the burden of his failures, and he does not mortgage his life into bondage to the failure of others." This book consists of a collection of essays by Ayn Rand as well as a number of additional articles by Nathaniel Branden. After introduc- ing the essential tenets of Objec- tivist ethics, they move into a wide range of contemporary problems such as intimidation, counterfeit in- dividualism, racism, the nature of government, man's rights, the cult of moral grayness, also asking and pondering the questions: Isn't ev- eryone selfish? Doesn't life require compromise? How does one lead a rational life in an irrational society? In his reason-bound schema of reality the Objectivist has no place for faith, referring to it as "a ma- lignancy that no system can toler- ate with impunity" with the further qualification that "the man who succumbs to it, will call on it in precisely those issues where he needs his reason most." Despite all of his apparent overt air of bra- vado the humanistic Objectivist seems to be whistling in the dark, a lonely itinerant without any "in- visible" means of support. Widi his ultimate commitment in that which is less than ultimate, self, he can- not ever hope to regain that requi- site relationship with his Maker and subsequent interaction with his fel- low man, mediated by love, to ac- quire that wholeness which is ho- liness, which is blessedness, which is happiness. J^etterd ZJo Z)he Cditor Not Enough Action Have you ever wondered why the so-called Christian church is not being persecuted today? What is it that aroused opposition in the past? Do you want to know just what it is that keeps the people of the church from being ridiculed and abused at every step? History and Mrs. White give us the an- swers to these questions. The woe that befell the early church came as a result of the fine work it was endeavoring to do. Paganism saw that her strongholds would fall to ruin if the church was allowed to continue its efforts. The aposdes and later followers of Christ were attempting to let their lights shine, and their zeal led them to sell their houses and other possessions so they might have a part in teaching the gospel. Satan as leader of the forces against the small, struggling Chris- tian church saw that his hope lay in its destruction, and he worked through a number of the prominent leaders in the Roman Empire to carry out his evil purposes. It was at this dreadful time in history that a number of God's peo- ple followed their Master to the grave, yet the more dreadful the acts of persecution the more God's flock seemed to thrive. So Satan laid another plan in which he had much more success. Satan saw that what he could not accomplish by force might be accomplished by deception. Pros- perity and worldly honor were sub- stituted for the Bible truths, and "compromise" was the word of the day. We do not have anything to wor- ry about because we are the best kind of Christians. We attend Sab- bath school and church; we go on sunshine bands and visit the orth- opedic hospital; we pray before we eat (sometimes not too thankfully) and we study our Sabbath school lessons every day. Hurrah for us. Now we are getting like the rich young ruler. Listen to Mrs. White's rebuke: "Why is it, then, that persecution seems in a great degree to slumber? The only reason is that the church has conformed to the world's stand- ard and therefore awakens no op- position. The religion which is cur- rent in our day is not of die pure and holy character that marked the Christian faith in the days of Christ and His apostles." (GC, p. 48). Lowell Rideout, freshman English major May 4, 1967 CLOCK TOWER 3 Hanoi Wants Out Of The War" BY RON HIXSON One of the experts, Harrison Sal- isbury of the New York Times, visited the University of Nebraska recently where he addressed sev- eral hundred concerned students on his observation while on his in- spection trip to Hanoi last year. According to Salisbury, Hanoi seems to want out of the war, but is forced by die bombing to con- tinue, hanging on to pride and the intense desire for self-survival. As long as the war lasts Hanoi can and is experiencing other fears. Salisbury said that Hanoi fears China's direct intervention. While Hanoi depends on China for war supplies she must face the possi- bility of a civil war within China and the cutting off of the supplies, said Salisbury. Across the vapor border China fears Hanoi's eagerness for settle- ment, Salisbury said. "The worst thing that could happen to China is for Hanoi to pull out of the war," Salisbury observed. Are all the fears on the other side of the curtain? No, said Salisbury. "It is very likely that Hanoi will ask China for troops if one of three situations develop," noted Salis- bury. He said that officials in Ha- noi said that the diree "ifs" are: (1) "if the US carries operations across the 17th parallel;" (2) "if the US makes amphibious landings in North Vietnam;" (3) "and if the war goes too close to China's fron- tier. "However," said Salisbury, "they wouldn't say how close is 'too close.'" Salisbury warned that "the ground rules in the Vietnam war will change if someone succeeds Mao. "Whoever it will be, his first move will be toward Russia and the end of the Russia-China split," predicted Salisbury. "When the bombings began in February, 1965, there was genuine fear of the fall of the South Viet- nam government," recalled Salis- bury. US officials, led by George McBundy, said Salisbury, proposed the bombing because, they argued, the effect would pressure Hanoi into a quick settlement. While in North Vietnam Salis- bury observed the damage the bombings were doing and die effect on the people, then he noted, "the bombing is not serving a major mil- itary purpose." However, he added, "maybe the bombing is serving a secondary one (purpose)." Salis- bury observed that "we really are beating up those roads, but they have enough laborers to fill in the holes made by the bombs within an hour or so," recalled Salisbury. "The roads are not very smooth, but they were not much better be- fore, either," he said. According to Salisbury, the US dropped 300,000 tons of bombs last year, and "we are headed for an all-time record this year," he noted, "which is way ahead of the heaviest bombing raids during World War II." Salisbury said that "the bomb- ings have united the North Viet- namese." Expressing their determi- nation to fight back Salisbury said, "They're willing to fight another ten or more years." Where is the war headed? Salis- bury joined the ranks of other "in- formed" officials of government and press when he admitted that no one is certain. About the only thing anyone can promise, Salis- bury said, is its continuance for an- other year or two. As the prophets of old often did, Salisbury recalled the past to shed some light on die future when he said, "In World War I we imposed settlement on Germany which im- planted the seeds of World War II." Reflecting for a moment, Sal- isbury solemnly said, "there is a danger in imposing a settlement on Hanoi, because the seeds we sow could return to haunt us with World War III." BY LINDA BRENNEN The target date for the presenta- tion of the 1967 Union College yearbook has been set for May 15. Over 2000 hours of student labor have been consumed in completing the plans of Bob Haddock, editor- in-chief. This year's annual covers one full year of activities from "Alumni Weekend 1966, to Alumni Weekend 1967, and features a two tone cloth cover. The cover is em- bossed and possesses a relatively simple design, according to Mike McGuckin, managing editor. Em- bossed paper is also used in the book. The exact number of color pages has not been .revealed. However, there are more than eight full pages of four-process color. One of the most frequent prob- lems in forming the annual this year was that of meeting deadlines, which resulted in several sleepless Saturday nights for the staff. Also, getting all copy in and proof-read to meet deadlines was another problem, one not uncommon in • publishing a yearbook. Each staff member was assigned duties which, if not performed, would have caused a definite lack of unity and cooperation in the or- ganization. Sherry Lynn Trammell, associate editor, supervised all copy and cap- tions. Mike McGuckin's duties as man- aging editor centered around the scheduling of the pictures of all campus organizations and activ- ities. Glenn Sackett, assistant editor, was in charge of advertisement lay- out and Dan Goddard functioned as advertising manager. Karen Boyle, Denver campus editor, reported all functions of the nursing students. Bettina Strickland, literary ed- itor, supervised the planning of die portrait section. Without the patient help of Don- na Lotspiech, secretary; Sandy Bayless, office manager; Phyllis Cunningham, student life editor; Lowell Chamberlain, business man- ager; Gail Hunt, cover design artist; Dean Fandrick, treasurer, and Jerry Mitchell, Bud Gooch, Eugene Knowles and Bob Haddock, pho- tographers, the 1967 Golden Cords could not have been as efficiently and quickly organized. Play, Prayerbands End MV Activities Friday, Apr. 21, the Union Col- lege MV presented "From Clock Tower to Cannibal Country." The play was adapted by Dr. C. Mer- vyn Maxwell, professor of religion, from material supplied by Dr. and Mrs. E. N. Dick and from In Strange Peril by Alta Christensen and Jungle Thorn by Norma Young- berg. The play centered around the life of Calvin Parker, UC's first foreign mission band leader and one of the first Unionites to give missionary service overseas. The trials and experiences of Parker and other pioneer missionaries were de- picted in the program. At die close of the program the MV officers for 1967-68 led the student group in torchlight prayer bands on the campus. In answer to the question "Are you glad you're through with this year's annual?" the best reply could perhaps be die description of Mike McGuckin's happy grin as he held up the two and one-half pounds of galleys representing the last few months of triumph on the part of the 1967 Golden Cords staff. (Photo by Bud Gooch) Thirteen sophomore student nurses were capped at the candlelight capping ceremony Apr. 28. They will begin their hospital work in June at Porter Memorial Hospital in Denver, Colo. May 15 Is GC Presentation Year Of Activities Covered (Photo by Bud Gooch) Dr. Neil Rowland, academic dean for next year, speaks at the dedication of the new Plumb addition to Jorgensen Hall, Apr. 28. 1. Pour and Mix 2. Pop In Oven 3. Ready To Serve •in WEIGHT lCV-Ot CONTAINS NO M*AT ^"tfinuowMix..^'^ MEAT-LOAF-IN-MINUTES Less than one hour from container to table ... so quick ... so easy... so delicious! Worthington's Meatless Meat- Loaf Mix. You add nothing but water. EASY as 1-2-3 For other tasty vegetarian foods, look for the BIG W: Worthington Foods, Inc. Worthington, Ohio 43085 Tomorrow's Foods Today Serving suggestions: top with tomato sauce, catsup, or Loma Linda Gravy Quik. 4 CLOCK TOWER May 4, 1967 Final Band Concert Features Horn Solo, Award For Duncan Climaxing a full weekend of Alumni activities, the Union Coir lege Concert Winds played their last concert of the season Satur- day night, Apr. 29. Their first number was the "North Sea Overture" which by tone and rhythm depicted the sea rising into a storm and calming again into gentle swells. A special number performed was Frank Hermann's "Concerto for Horn." Dr. Melvin Hill, conductor, was the soloist in this number which featured the French horn. ^ Gustav Hoist's "2nd Suite in F" opened the second half of the con- cert. Several different families of instruments were brought into play in this number. Some of the more unusual ones to be heard were the tuba, bassoon, oboe, baritone and percussion sections. The Bandman of the Year Award (John Phillip Sousa Award) was aiso presented at this time. Pres- ident R. W. Fowler officiated in awarding Don Duncan this special title. Duncan was chosen by his fellow band members on the basis of Christian courtesy, spirit on tours and cooperation with the group. To close die concert, die Concert Winds played the "Blue-Tail Fly." Ping Pong Instead of Track for School Picnic The original plans for die annual college picnic at Pioneers Park on May 3 were foiled by a four-inch snowfall which began early Wed- nesday morning. The day's activ- ities, coordinated by Lary Taylor, chairman of the health and recre- ation committee, were not totally disrupted, however. The location for the day's plans was moved to the gymnasium. Bad- minton, basketball, and ping pong were played diroughout the day. At 12:00 a picnic-type lunch was served at the cafeteria, despite the mid-winter weather. Several films were shown in the ad building at 2:30 p.m. Among these were "The Great Adventure" and "The River of No Return." The scheduled softball games that officially commenced the pic- nic Tuesday evening were played as originally planned. In the soph- omore-senior game, die sophomores won 5-0. The juniors defeated the freshmen 9-0. Bv BOB BLEHM Sunday morning the Union Col- lege Alumni played the Union Col- lege basketball team. The game ended with Union College on top 79-70. Larry Unruh led the UC team with 24 points. Paul Gnadt led the alumni with 25. The softball season has been hav- ing a rough time getting started as Fleming and Johnson were mowed out last week and rain has delayed other games. Hixson defeated Verio Monday evening 5-4. Going into the bottom of die fifth Verio led 4-2, but a streak of wildness helped Hixson draw five base on balls. The base on balls mixed with Ron Scott's base hits produced three runs and a Hixson victory. Johnson defeated Schultz 1-0 in an error-free game. Johnson's only run came in the first inning when Larry Crawford doubled with two outs. Don Soderstrom followed with a single to claim the RBI and the game's only run. Fleming defeated Hixson Thurs- day night 7-2 on a five-run second inning. This gave Fleming a 2 and 1 record. Sunday night he evened his record when Schultz defeated him 5-1. LEAGUE STANDINGS W L W L Johnson 2 0 Schultz 2 3 Hixson 3 1 Verio 1 3 Fleming 2 2 Library Adds A coin-operated Xerox 914 Cop- ier is available for general use at the Union College Library. The Xerox unit is located in the hall by the main entrance. Xerox Copier According to die Xerox Com- pany, the 914 Copier copies "any- thing the eye can see," including magazines, pages out of a book, private documents and even three dimensional pictures. TRAIN AT THE MIDWESTS OLDEST AND MOST MODERN BUSINESS COLLEGE FACILITY if Professional accounting if Private Secretarial if Business Administration if Executive Secretarial if Accounting if Stenographic if General Bnsincss TWO GREAT SCHOOLS COMBINED IN ONE NEW BUILDING LINCOLN SCHOOL of COMMERCE & NBi 1821 "K" STREET LINCOLN, NEBRASKA 432-5315 On Campus MaxMman {By the author of "Rally Round the Flag, Boys!", "Dobie GiUis," elc.) HOW TO GET A'S IN ALL YOUR FINAL EXAMS (Photo by Bud Gooch) Don Duncan, senior music major, holds the John Philip Sousa Award he was given last Saturday night when he was announced as Bandman of the Year. Duncan plays the oboe in the Concert Winds. UC Wins Over Alumni; Johnson Leads In Softball In today's column, the last of the school year, I don't intend to be funny. (I have achieved this objective many times throughout the year, but this time it's on purpose.) The hour is wrong for levity. Final exams are looming. Have you got a chance? I say yes! I say America did not become the world's foremost producer of stove bolts and cotter pins by running away from a fight! You will pass your finals! How? By studying. How? By learning mnemonics. Mnemonics, the science of memory aids, was, as we all know, invented by the great Greek philosopher Mnemon in 526 B.C. (This, incidentally, was only one of the inven- tions of this fertile Athenian. He also invented the house cat, the opposing thumb, and, most important, the stair- case. Before the staircase people were forced willy-nilly to live out their lives on the ground floor, and many grew cross as bears. Especially Demosthenes who was elected Consul of Athens six times but never served because he was unable to get up to the office of the Commissioner of Oaths on the third floor to be sworn in. But after Mnemon's staircase, Demosthenes got to the third floor easy as pie —to Athens' sorrow, as it turned out. Demosthenes, his temper shortened by years of confinement to the ground floor, soon embroiled his countrymen in a series of sense- less wars with the Medes, the Persians, and the Los Angeles Rams. This later became known as the Missouri Compromise.) But I digress. We were discussing mnemonics, which are nothing more than aids to memory — little jingles to help you remember names, dates, and places. For example: Columbus sailed the ocean blue In fourteen hundred ninety two. See how simple? Make up your own jingles. What, for instance, came after Columbus's discovery of America? The Boston Tea Party, of course. Try this: Samuel Adams fiang the tea Into the briny Zuyder Zee. (NOTE: The Zuyder Zee was located in Boston Harbor until 1801 when Salmon P. Chase traded it to Holland for Alaska and two line backers.) But I digress. Let's get back to mnemonics. Like this: In nineteen hundred sixty seven Personna Blades make shaving heaven. I mention Personna because the makers of Personna Super Stainless Steel Blades are the sponsors of this column. If I may get a little misty in this, the final column of the school year, may I say it's been a pleasure working for Personna ? May I say further that it's been an even greater pleasure working for you, the undergrads of America ? You've been a most satisfactory audience, and I'm going to miss you this summer. In fact, I'd ask you all to come visit me except there is no access to my room. The makers of Personna, after I missed several deadlines, walled me in. I have no doors or windows—only a mail slot. I slip the columns out; they slip in Personnas and such food as can go through a mail slot. (For the past six months I've been living on after dinner mints.) I am only having my little joke. The makers of Personna have not walled me in, for they are good and true and gleaming and constant —as good and true and gleaming and constant as the blades they make—and I wish to state publicly that I will always hold them in the highest esteem, no matter how my suit for back wages comes out. And so, to close the year, I give you one last mnemonic: Study hard and pass with honors, And always shave with good Personnors! * * * © 1967, Mm Shulmnn Personna and Personna's partner in luxury shaving, Burma-Shave, regular or menthol, have enjoyed bring- ing you another year of Max's uncensored and uninhib- ited column. We thank you for supporting our products; ice wish you luck in your exams and in all your other enterprises. Soufhside Cleaners Lincoln's Finest 4702 Prescott ALICE'S CAFE Homestyle Cooking 4013 So. 48th St. TEACHERS If you are interested in lo- cating in a particular area then we can be of excellent service to you. We specialize on personal- ized service and try to meet your needs and desires. It is not too early to enroll. Write for information. DAVIS SCHOOL SERVICE Miss Beulah Crain, Manager 501 Stuart Bldg. Lincoln, Nebraska